- Warning: Pregnant women, the elderly and children under 10 should avoid prolonged exposure to Happy Fun Shake.
- Caution: Happy Fun Shake may suddenly accelerate to dangerous speeds.
- Happy Fun Shake Contains a liquid core, which, if exposed due to rupture, should not be touched, inhaled, or looked at.
- Do not use Happy Fun Shake on concrete.
Discontinue use of Happy Fun Shake if any of the following occurs:
- Itching
- Vertigo
- Dizziness
- Tingling in extremities
- Loss of balance or coordination
- Slurred speech
- Temporary blindness
- Profuse sweating
- Heart palpitations
If Happy Fun Shake begins to smoke, run away.
Happy Fun Shake may stick to certain types of skin.
When not in use, Happy Fun Shake should be returned to its special container...
Failure to do so relieves the makers of Happy Fun Shake, Wacky Products Incorporated, and its parent company Global Chemical Unlimited, of liability.
Ingredients of Happy Fun Shake include an unknown glowing substance which fell to Earth, presumably from outer space.
Happy Fun Shake has been shipped to our troops in Iraq and is also being dropped by our warplanes.
Do not taunt Happy Fun Shake.
Happy Fun Shake comes with a lifetime guarantee.
ACCEPT NO SUBSTITUTES!
(HT: KC)
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