God has chosen to bless the “Youth Pastor” model for several decades. It could be said that much good has been done in the name of “youth groups” and “youth ministry.” But parents are being circumvented. The current model often unintentionally encourages parents to abdicate their biblical responsibility by its very existence. My questions are these: Are parents doing their job? Are parents raising godly children according to the scriptures? If not, what do we do about it? We hire a youth pastor. It’s the church's reflexive solution to poor parenting. We hire a youth pastor to do for us what we are unable or unwilling as parents to do ourselves.
*What about parents who lack spiritual maturity?
We cannot ignore the fact that dysfunctional families will always exist in the church. Their children will need ministry. The question is how do we respond to this need? A family pastor model would address the root of the issue, the parents. It’s not the most convenient answer. It’s also not as fun. But when I contemplate 20, 50, or 100 years down the road I’m convinced equipping and training parents is paramount in obeying the great commission and the great commandment. The standard YP model provides short term, symptomatic teen solutions whereas parental reformation would yield long term results as the next generation emerges.
*What if parents don’t want to be trained?
How much time and money is spent every year putting out fires that could have been addressed much earlier by equipping parents to do their job? Our youth need moms and dads who know the Word of God and are held accountable by a strong eldership committed to strengthening the family. This is where the rubber meets the road. We can talk about family values and parental responsibility all day long but it’s another thing completely to embody those values by making them a budgetary priority. Parenting must be intentionally and consistently addressed in the church for a healthy, vibrant, youth ministry to emerge. Any youth pastor model that excludes parents is predetermined to fail based on the fact that parents, not youth pastors, are primarily responsible for their kid’s souls.
*What about youth evangelism?
Our primary role as parents and church leaders is to prepare our children and youth for a lifetime of Christian service. Most youth are more easily influenced than influential. Using weekly youth meetings primarily as evangelism opportunities is short sighted. I’m sure the youth group evangelism emphasis has been used to produce some good fruit. My questions would be these:
A) How much of this “fruit” remains?
B) How many of these “converts” are in the church today?
C) How much discipleship potential has been supplanted in the process?
Those questions may sound cold but I believe we should regularly measure the effectiveness of any ministry and be willing to make necessary adjustments. Weekly youth services should be used primarily as discipleship training opportunities for our Christian youth. We should create a safe, discipleship-friendly environment where young people can mature quickly in Christ-like character. When their friends visit they will have a far more compelling picture of who this Jesus is. They’ll have witnessed His character firsthand.
Un-churched youth must be reached with the gospel. Statistically this is the harvest field demographic. Much time and prayer should be spent considering the best ways to reach them before they make permanent faith based decisions. Hospitality is the church’s untapped evangelistic natural resource. We should be inviting our lost neighbors and friends into our homes on a regular basis. Then we can share the love of Christ with them from a position of strength. It begins with the example of the parents. As we cast the vision of hospitality and reaching our neighbors through our example I believe our kids will follow. They’ll begin inviting their lost friends over to the house. I’m all for youth evangelism. Nearly half (43%) of all Americans who accept Jesus Christ as their savior do so before reaching the age of 13 (Barna: 2004) With parents leading the way our youth are called and empowered to reach their generation with the gospel much more effectively. 78% of American teens say that their parents have a lot of influence on their life. (Barna: 1997) Josh McDowell writes, "The most powerful impact upon a child's ethical, moral and spiritual development is the relationship with the parents. It is 300 times greater than the church."
Thoughtful post. I agree with the need for training parents. Good to see the blog up.
On your header, you have the "400" center column size which is smaller than mine. So your header is too big. Either shrink the header or just up the size of the center column to 500.
Posted by: Steve McCoy | July 20, 2005 at 06:57 PM
Thanks for your help Steve!
Posted by: James Paul | July 21, 2005 at 03:17 PM
I agree we need a safe place for the unchurched and to teach parents how to raise their children, but we also have to remember that a huge majority of unchurched youth don't believe in anything good let alone a single God. Their own parents stink at loving them so how will you convince them that a God they can not see will love them? Just things to think about when dealing with unchurched teens, from my experiance with Youth Dynamics. Plus there are so many other "religions" out there that sound so much more fun to them. I delt with a 15yr old Satan worhiper who could make things float and had seen the spirits of the sacrificed animals leave their bodies, that no matter what I shared with him about God I could not compete with that to him. Today's youth has ALOT more thrown at them then in the past.
Posted by: Tracy | August 09, 2005 at 11:18 AM
Jim,
You make a lot of good points; however, I believe it is also important to have an environment where kids have peers who believe and are walking the same path they are (ie. the need for youth connections of some sort--which could happen via family hospitality). I keep praying and asking the Lord what is the best model...as far as both raising children in church where they have an opportunity to be discipled and be disciplers. I like the YWAM King's Kids approach because they use the family as a model and the teens are the 'link', so to speak, between the parent and the children. I was just talking to Phil and saying how I thought we should be considering doing doctrine classes at church for the children. Why not? Children raised in a righteous environment can be stronger in their faith as children then many adults. It sounds like you have read Barna's book with a title something like Transforming Children Into Spiritual Champions. It's excellent. I have been so stirred for about a year and a half...since reading the book....and just asking the Lord what is the medium to use to capture this generation (the unchurched). I have a lot of ideas brewing but none are God-ideas for this particular season yet. I know He's got just the mode though and will reveal it as soon as it's the right timing. Just a few thoughts as I wandered on your sight. I need to go to bed now. :) Blessings to you and yours!!!!
Posted by: Shanda Harris | August 14, 2005 at 11:32 PM
Thanks Tracy and Shanda for your thoughts. I love the discussion. Our children and youth deserve our prayerful, thoughtful, and imaginative best.
Shanda, I'm encouraged to hear that God is stirring you to re-think and dream about ways to reach the unchurched. Please visit again and tell Phil "hi!"
Posted by: James Paul | August 15, 2005 at 03:01 AM